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Living in Love and Faith: A message from the Dean

Tuesday 31 January

A message from the Dean following the recent announcement from the Church of England concerning blessings in church for same sex couples.

Dear Friends

You will have heard or read the recent announcement from the Church of England concerning blessings in church for same sex couples. Our Diocesan website carries a full explanation of how the process has unfolded, some of which is set out here:

Living in Love and Faith is a process initiated by the Church of England in 2017 to consider questions of sexuality, relationship and marriage.  Over the last five years everyone was invited to come together to learn and listen to one and other and to God.  

The findings of the responses to this churchwide engagement were published on 2 September 2022 under the title, ‘Listening with Love and Faith’.   

The College of Bishops has gathered together on three occasions between September 2022 and January 2023 to agree on outcomes from this process to bring to General Synod in February 2023.   

The proposals, announced on 20 January, offer the fullest possible pastoral provision for all relationships without changing the Church’s doctrine of Holy Matrimony for same-sex couples. This provision would be through a range of draft prayers, known as Prayers of Love and Faith, which could be used in churches for couples who have marked a significant stage of their relationship such as a civil marriage or civil partnership.  

Same-sex couples would still not be able to get married in a Church of England church, but could have a service in which there would be prayers of dedication, thanksgiving or for God’s blessing on the couple in church following a civil marriage or partnership. 
 
The prayers would be voluntary for clergy to use and could be used in different combinations reflecting the theological diversity of the Church. 

These proposals will be presented to General Synod in February and may be further debated in the General Synod meeting in July as well.  

So where does the Cathedral stand on these matters?

Personally, I have added my name to a letter to the Church Times signed by 26 Cathedral Deans which says the following:

Cathedrals serve all the church and community and often have track records of being safer places for LGBT+ people in a church that can be poor at radical Christian inclusion. We recognise change has been too slow and that perfection can be the enemy of the good. Therefore, we generally welcome the new proposals from the College of Bishops following LLF. Cathedrals will look forward to officially offering services using ‘Prayers for Love and Faith’ with gay and lesbian couples.

Many of us still yearn to go further and to be able to offer equal marriage services. We recognise this is a legitimate hope about which there need be no unhealthy conspiracy of silence whilst others will disagree with that hope. We also recognise that dismantling homophobia is not a quick or painless task in our cathedrals and so we commit to taking the apologetic words from our bishops and turning them into local actions that will address harm caused to so many siblings in Christ.


I fully support this statement and have shared my views with my colleagues on Chapter most of whom are able to endorse this approach and would wish to make it possible for such services to be held in this Cathedral. I would add that what we are doing is to affirm the decision of our archbishops and bishops. There will, inevitably be those for whom this is a step too far, but equally, many others, who have yearned for the day when all faithful and loving relationships can be blessed by God and surrounded by the prayers of the Church.

Down the years the Church has wrestled with a number of issues that have, at the time, been controversial, including the ministry of women and the remarriage of divorcees, and we have learnt to honour and respect our differences but not be constrained by them. I see no reason why we cannot come to a similar accommodation now.

I believe that we now need to take this next cautious step, trusting in the guidance of the Holy Spirit and in a spirit of generosity and grace and with a commitment to a generous and joyful inclusivity of which our Cathedral Vision Statement speaks.

I would be happy to discuss these issues with anyone who has concerns or questions but, meanwhile, we shall hold the Bishops and the members of General Synod in our prayers in these coming days and weeks and of course all those for whom this has a deeply personal significance.

With every blessing



The Very Revd Christopher Dalliston
Dean of Peterborough

 

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